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Stop Living Someone Else's Reflection of You

August 15, 2017


Babies are cute. They come into the world completely confident in being a baby. They know exactly how to do it. They aren't concerned with how chubby they are or that they have no teeth or hair. They are perfect in their own eyes. They are not self-aware the way you and I are. They have sense of want and need, and they do what is required to fulfill those needs; getting us dumb tall people to do their bidding! Once their gargantuan slaves have fulfilled their every need, they are content and happy with absolutely no worries.


At some point, they recognize their physical selves. They react to seeing themselves in the mirror. They explore fingers and toes and belly buttons. Still, there is nothing in their sweet little minds to tell them that they are not worthy, that they are anything but perfect. They have no concern that the baby next door has a more expensive stroller.


As they get older, they start to compare themselves to others. They want to do the things that older kids and adults do. They start to concern themselves with their wardrobe and their hair style. They start wanting to fit in. Their all-too-human competitive nature kicks in, and they want to be liked, popular, top dog. In order to obtain this goal, they have to conform to what others think they should be, losing sight of who and what they really are: perfect.


They start looking at their peers and those they consider to be superior to them in social standing and so the comparisons begin. Their best friend from 3rd grade is overweight and rather nerdy (in their opinion), so they start to pull away from that person. In the same regard, people have pulled away from them for any number of ridiculous reasons. They start emulating those they want to be like, and when they can't achieve that idealized and unobtainable image, they start to feel unworthy, unaccepted, unloved, unappreciated.


While high school seems to be the breeding ground for this, we carry these traits well into adulthood. We worry that we aren't rich enough, thin enough, sexy enough, smart enough....good enough. It's time to take stock of what makes you unique and special and perfect and freakin' embrace it! OWN it! Love it!


You will never do everything perfectly. You will not be the best at everything you try. You are the best you. There is no one who can do you the way you can. 


Your body has been with you since the day you were born. Celebrate it! It's been your constant companion throughout your life. Have you treated it like you would a cherished child? If not, you should. It houses you. It encases your very essence. It is precious, regardless of how big or small it is. Whether the hair on it is thinning or gone is irrelevant. The size of your boobs is not going to change the tiniest aspect of who you are as a glorious being. That is what you are, and it is high time you started treating yourself with the love, gratitude and faithfulness you deserve as a divine being.


At the same time, recognize the glorious being in others. Look past what you would consider to be flaws and realize that person is an immensely perfect light. See the humanity in every single person, and treat everyone with equality of love, forgiveness, and acceptance.


I know that this is easier said than done. I find myself looking askance at something someone is wearing, and judging "them" for their choice of wardrobe. Who the hell am I to do that? I do try to catch myself in those moments and realign myself with my true self rather than my ego (who wants to be superior, to win, to be better than others). When I can get past that ego, I can then see that person as a human being; a glorious being, and I am much happier for it. 


When I can let go of my judgments, I can feel a peace and calm and a oneness with everyone and everything. I can see that perfect baby and be intrigued by imagining what experiences they have had to bring them to wear a zebra striped onesie to the grocery store.


The next time you look in the mirror, I want you to do the same for yourself. Reflect not on your perceived flaws, but on all the amazing and wonderful things you do and have done in your life. Every single person on this planet has purpose and meaning. Every single person is worthy, and that means you.

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